Maybe she's not officially a "toddler" yet, but we are quickly approaching the next age category.  LE is up and UP on everthing she can get her little feet on.  She started climbing about the same day she started linking steps together.  Up on the couch, over the arm - up on her chair, onto her table.  Standing up in the shopping carts and up on the dining room table.  She wants to be at the top. 

This year for Halloween, I made LE a fish costume with a fish cape and a green dress.  Of course, the outfit has a hood that she instantly rips off her head, but for short stints she'll keep it on.  She moves a bit like a Tyranasarus Rex with her arms bent and a hip waggle that makes everyone squeal with delight - including herself.  The fish tail had a nice swagger as she walks. 

Mom was up for the Halloween week festivities, and we had a great time visiting, playing with stuffed animals, new felt pen markers, homemade play-dough, and learning all kinds of words.  Linnea's new word is "no no" right now, and she still has a cute-factor going on with it that makes it sound so sweet.  LE, sit down - "no no".  LE, eat this "no no".  LE, time to go night night - "no no no".  Ask me in a month if it is still as cute.  

Other words we're enjoying are "trak-chr" (tractor), "chu-che" (turtle), ji-cha (diaper), "ga-choo" (dogfood), and of course "na-ne" (pumpkin) - no idea on that one.  

We have tried a few times to take LE to see some farm animals, but so far we've struck out.  Last weekend we went to Hovander Park, but all that was left of the summer animals were a few turkeys, geese and bunny rabbits.  LE didn't complain though, there were lots of rocks, exposed dirt and apples in the trees to keep her heart content.  

I found myself looking Linnea in the eye yesterday and thinking "Wow, do I even know you?"  She's growing up so fast that I can hardly keep up with the mental concept apparently.  The neurons in her brain are firing off all day long and you can just tell she's constantly linking words and actions and reactions.  She's learning how things fit inside each other (although she still can't get the doughnut on the stick the right way), and how to stack things on top of each other.  We live in a fascinating place.  

How nice it is to find delight in simple things again, like a single blueberry ready to eat, a handful of bubbles, the squack of a goose, a ball bouncing by,  and daddy coming home.

Now that we're into the throws of parenting a mobile child, we're finding that the 20 minutes of relaxation we get each weeknight is pretty special.  Usually we watch an episode of Arrested Development - a super low key, mediocre comedy about a wealthy and dysfunctional family.  We've been having several little moments of bliss with our little Linnea though, which makes it all worth our while (not like we have a choice).

At the park, Linnea has started making rounds with Isaac, her weekday playmate, on the slide junglegym at the park.  They crawl/climb up the stairs and sit right on the edge of the top of the slide as if they are anticipating what is to come.  Kind of like being home alone with your Christmas presents and not opening them - as to prolong the feeling of excitement just a little bit.  They decide the position just before going down and press a foot foward, twist their hips, or just lunge with arms outstretched.  Sometimes they fly right off the bottom and sometimes LE stops just short of the end and lays her head back to rest.  

I ask her where her lizard is, and she sticks her tongue in and out like I showed her a couple months ago.  Now when she sees a picture of a lizard, even a pencil drawing, she sticks her tongue in and out.  She gets it.

For some reason, she's instinctually afraid of bugs that look like spiders.  We had one of those flying daddy long leg-looking guys flying around the bathtub and she wouldn't take her eyes off it.  I tried to make it sound cool and nice and fun to watch, but she just wanted to back away from it and whine a little.  She notices the spiders in the windows and says "pipa".  They say kids understand about 50% more than you think they do.  I asked her "do you want to lay down" in her bubble bath last night - something she's been doing for a couple weeks on her own - and she stopped for a couple seconds before arching back and grinning with delight as the water filled her ears.  I guess she understands "lay down" now.

She's started calling her pacifier her "Ni-Ni" because every time she gets to have it, we ask her if she's ready to go "night night".  I can see her lips open showing all 4 of her little front teeth as she lights up saying "Ni-Ni...Ni-Ni...Ni-Ni".  Sometimes we're not sure what she's up to in the middle of the day, and we walk into her dark room to find her sucking on her Ni-Ni that she has craftfully pulled through the bars of her crib.  We now refer to this as "sneaking a hit off the Ni-Ni".

This past week she took her first unassisted steps.  By Friday morning, she had linked about 7 in a row.  By Friday afternoon, she had pulled a potted plant down off of a high table onto her right ankle.  We rushed home to ice it and to buy some arnica and arnica lotion.  To - or not to - go to the hospital for an X-Ray.  Hey, at least she made it past her first birthday without a broken bone, right?  Swollen, scratched up, not weighting it, etc.  What a mess.  By morning, it wasn't looking any worse, and the doctor encouraged us to wait it out a bit more.  So far today, she's walking and talking like it aint no big deal - and we even got her some brand new shoes without a fuss.  So, we think we're safe to avoid the radiation for now.  We bought a few extra baby-proofing supplies though, and the potted plant is awaiting it's new destiny as a yard decoraton and/or compost.

We finally dragged our old futon mattress out of the attic so we could get rid of it and "save room".  Since then, our living room is now filled with said futon mattress, and it's been a month.  How can we resist little Linnea and Isaac wrestling and snuggling with their like-sized stuffed animals?  As a matter of fact, it is a good excuse to lay down and play with them at the same time. The dogs like it.  We like it.  We might have made a mistake, because I don't see it going away anytime soon.

She's a dirt eater and a rock hound.  Nothing is more fun than digging and spreading dirt from here to there.  Rocks feel good on her teeth.  Plus, it makes mom and dad go phtttssstt "no - get that out of there", and they make funny faces.  Cool.

She looks at the bag of dog poop I've picked up at the park and goes "Phtttsstt".  I'm trying to get her to follow with "yucky" - but for now, she's pretty happy with herself for giving it a raspberry noise.

I went into the kitchen to rinse off a rag and turned to see - to my horror - the high chair tipping over sideways with LE inside.  Aaaack!  The dogs scattered about and I ran to get her out.  She cried for a few moments and was fine - but I had a nice dose of adrenaline that I didn't really need.  Somehow she managed to keep her arms out of harms way. 

LE loves chairs.   Is there a name for that?  She climbs on them and gets in and out repeatedly.  I'd like to fill the futon-room with her old car seats, blow-up chairs, wooden chairs, lawn chairs, anything that is a little chair, and see what she does.  That might very well be the best surprise present ever for a 12-month old.  Today I realized that I'm turning into the parent I didn't want to be.  I considered buying a miniature lounge chair because it was "only" $100.  What?  ...Well, I escaped without buying it, but my mind does toil with the thought of seeing her and Isaac all over that chair - what have I become?  Is there hope for me - it has only been a year!

Another thing LE loves is Lids.  Tupperware lids, screw-on lids, snap on lids, milk jug lids, you name it.  If you can put something flat on something else, LE wants to do it.  Sometimes putting the milk lid on is enough to stiffle a temper tantrum.  Hmm, I wonder how long that will work....

Every day is filled with little moments that make me laugh, worry, question myself and give me pride.  I'm more and more in love than I ever imagined.   Everyone said this would happen.  I wonder what is going to happen next, but I try not to get too wrapped up in it.  Right now I'm glad I'm here.  I'm where I want to be.

Grandma Mary was up visiting for the last couple of weeks while our nanny Olivia was gone on vacation.  In that amount of time, Little Linnea has made big strides in her daily activities.  On the first day, we noticed that she was doing a bit more moving around than in the past, so we set up a nice padded barricaded PlayLand in our living room.  I'm not sure why we even dismantle it at night, since we just put it back the next morning - but I guess it saves a little on the dog hair clean up.  Mocha and Lucy are quite fond of PlayLand except for the fact that Linnea is always in it.   The dogs, by the way are doing great with the baby and they let her fondle their feet and tails for about 20 seconds before up and moving.

We officially witnessed crawling motion with the chest off the floor.  According to all the food packaging instructions, that means Linnea has also officially graduated to being able to eat finger foods and teething biscuits.   That's a good thing, because we're already giving them to her.  Finger foods - the kid adores them.  She knows two baby hand signs so far - more (tapping her fists together) and milk (squeezing her fingers shut on one hand).  When given any sort of cube-shaped or drop shaped item of bite size, Linnea instantly puts one in each hand and gives the sign for "more" - as if to say that she already knows she's going to need more before she even tries them.  

Speaking of food, there is hardly anything we've found that turns her off.  The one thing was pesto pasta - not a good face on that one, and spit it out.  However, we've managed to get great reactions from beets, coffee, bacon, hot sauce (not really), hummus, pickles, Tim's Cascade Potato Chips (who wouldn't like them), lentils, broccoli, plain yogurt, and tea.  As a matter of fact, when Grandma gave her a sip of tea last night, she gulped it down like she hadn't had anything to drink in 3 days and she was rather appalled that Grandma wouldn't give her more more more.  

You're probably wondering about the Bee Sting.  Yeah, that wasn't a good mothering day.  It was a nice day outside.  The backyard was freshly mowed and Dad was doing some yardwork, so we wanted to join him.  Linnea has been practicing her walking skills, so even though I knew there would be some bees walking in the grass, I thought I'd watch very VERY carefully as we pranced around singing and walking little walking steps.  Much to my surprise, a heartfelt cry came out of nowhere and I lifted her up to wipe the grass off - to find a bee attached to her itty bitty foot.  Well crap - that was stupid.  So, she's totally teary eyed and in obvious pain as Miguel and I rushed her to the kitchen for some baking soda, ice packs and attempted distraction.  She settled down fairly quickly and I took her to the park to swing for a bit.  Luckily she had little to no swelling and aside from the couple hours of whimpering and broken mother, is no worse for the wear.  

So, what does every child need that is trying to learn to walk and has bees in the backyard?  Shoes!  Pink Shoes!  Grandma went straight to the baby store to pick up some lovely itty bitty sandals and Linnea just adores them.  She's pretty certain that she now has to work extra hard and pick her feet up 3 more inches to clear the shoes from the ground - so she looks a bit like a soldier when she walks - but she's already smitten with her fancy feet.

It was a sad moment when Grandma got in her car for the last time and drove away.  Linnea and I stood and watched as her car moved out of sight.  We had so much fun visiting, making dinners & breakfasts, learning, crawling and crying.   Time moves so fast when you look back at the memories.  Thanks mom, for being a part of all of the hustle and bustle - even taking our last chicken to her new home (she wasn't ready for chicken heaven just yet).  We look forward to seeing you next time!  Oh the fun we'll have then too.

Tonight as I was feeding Linnea before bed, I noticed a twinge of pain that was unfamiliar.  Low and behold, upon further inspection with my finger - a tiny point in her bottom gumline!  Teeth ladies and gentlemen - have arrived!  Of course, actually seeing the teeth was impossible and out of the question without major fussing and fighting before bed, but soon those photos will show pearly whites in her cheeky smile.   Stay tuned! 

Last night we had 9 toddlers and babies at our house for a once in a lifetime photo shoot.  The kids were all up for it for the first 30 minutes of the gathering, but as we waited for everyone to show up, their enthusiasm waned.  We ended up with a pretty good shot amidst all of the chaos.  They lined up from oldest to youngest.   Archer, Eliot, Finn, Hans, Oliver, Isaac, Alden, Linnea and Fisher.  We want to do this again, perhaps annually if we can make it happen.  We're totally looking forward to showing this to everyone when they're 18 years older.

Right now I'm sitting in our quiet living room with the sun cascading through the leaves of our spindly avacado plant and across Linnea's bouncy seat onto the floor.  Our house is now a menagerie of colorful do-dads with dangling monkeys, parrots and giraffes of a rainbow of hokey colors.  I've spent portions of the last two nights on the couch because I managed to come down with yet another cold.  Speaking of the cold - as a tangent - I am getting a little tired of this.  First I was pregnant - then I had the baby and couldn't do anything for 2 months.  Then I got sick right after Christmas with a hard hit to my lungs (colds must hone in on the weakest link of an asthmatic).   Just as I was finishing the nasty coughing stage, I managed to crack a rib or three on my first mountain bike ride.  That set me back into "injured" mode for another 6 weeks, and just as the ribs were healing, I came down with this other cold that has masacred my lungs again.  Even though it sounds pitiful, I've still managed to go to all but 4 days of Boot Camp throughout all of this, and I'm only 6 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight.  So there.  Thank you - year 2010 - for sparing me the searing pain of coughing whilst nursing cracked (or bruised, possibly) ribs, but seriously - a little bit of a break from injuries and illness would be appreciated.

Back to the main point here - in that we are well into the baby-fied house decorations.  I used to snarl when we had too many things shoved into corners, or if the throw pillows didn't match the walls, and now I'm living with not only a playland colors galore, but daily stumbling over Jaques the Peacock and Sophie the Giraffe, and picking up tiny stray socks that find their way all over the house. We have a jolly jumper in the main doorway to the kitchen and our dining room table is taken over by a dangling toy playland.  Needless to say, our lives and our home decorating feng shui have changed.

Linnea has passed her 5 month mark and apart from this cold she's fighting, she's developing into her own person.  One of the most evident traits she got from her dad and I is her determination to do things.  Many times - although it is unapparent to us what she is trying to do - she grunts and presses and shrieks and smacks her hands down as if she has challenged herself to do a task - like smack a toy up and down 10 times and then throw it on the ground.  We have one toy in particular that has a plastic triangle, square and circle that fit in a tree-shaped plastic thing, all of which are too big to fit in her mouth, and she gets downright pissed off when the entire tree doesn't fit in her mouth the way she wants it to.  We have to take that one away most of the time.  If we're a little slow on the draw in getting her food, she raises her shrieking frequency and decibals until the food reaches her lips.   If she doesn't want to be in the stroller anymore bouncing along the trial, you will know.

My favorite times with her are when she's just finished eating and she's content just to lay back in my arms.  Or the times when she wakes up in our bed and gives me a big smile when she opens her eyes.  Sometimes I wish I could play Pat-a-Cake with her for hours without getting tired of it - because she smiles so big when I clap and pat her little hands.  She's pretty much interested in everything we ever have in our hands and she reaches out her little hands with her fingers spread wide open as if that item - that beer bottle, coffee cup, bite of salad or dirty Kleenex is all she's ever wanted.  Luckily she's still easily distracted, so we just have to pick up something else to give to her - and she does it all over again.  

I think she's already starting to play us a bit - in that she knows we get excited when she smiles and that we will do almost anything to see her laugh.  I think she's got us wrapped around her litte finger and she holds back until she wants to give us the pleasure.  She anticipates a tickling session with great big eyes and a promising grin, but most of the time once you actually start tickling her, she doesn't give you that last 10% into a laugh - she just holds out, as if to say "Nah, try something else".   She is also starting to remember things from the past and I think she uses them against us.  If we've just squeegeed snot out of her nose, no laughs for at least 2 days.  She'll smile all over you until you bring out the evil eye of the camera - and then totally straight faced until the camera is put away.  We have a whopping 3 photos of this kid smiling - and a handful of her half smiling.  What a trickster.

In developmental news, Linnea is rolling from her back to her tummy.  She's eating oatmeal cereal, squash, yams, sweet potatoes and carrots.  Her stools are moving away from being benign breast milk messes to actual smelly unpleasant messes.  She's sleeping about the same at night - 4 to 5 hours at a stretch, but her daytime naps are really lacking.  On average, she's sleeping two 20 minute naps during the day.  My book on healthy baby sleep says she should be getting at least 4 HOURS during the day.  I'm investing in blackout curtains this weekend to see if that does the trick.  She's "cawing" and "uhhing" and she talks to the dogs a lot.  We think she weighs about 16lbs and she's got chubby legs and a plump tummy.  Her eyes are turning more brown every day.  Her favorite song is one that Miguel made up and she smiles every time he starts singing "There's a girl named Li-nnea - she likes to suck on her pac-i-fiah"...

We're very lucky - and loving every moment with her. 

First Day of Swimming from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.

Hiking with Fisher from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.

It is all very exciting.  Everything is practically a "first" around here these days.  It started with the "first" time she grabbed at the toys dangling down in front of her.  Then it was the first time she smiled, the first time she "kicked the monkey", her first snow, the first time she rolled onto her side.  Now we've moved on to sitting upright in the high chair, getting a first laugh - although we're still waiting for a real laugh that doesn't leave us wondering - and at last, the first time she realized she had FEET, and that they are attached.  We even took her swimming for the first time this weekend. 

Linnea's 4 month birthday was two days ago, and she's just a little ball of joy now.  We really love getting to know her, and I only wish we had more time to be with  each other.  We've got a plethora of new videos that I finally put together this weekend. Mostly for the grandparents who are willing to endure baby video, but also for any of our friends that need a break from work.  Oh, and these photos were just too cute not to pass on. 

First Snows for the Baby from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.

Linnea Was Born to Run from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.

4 Months Old from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.

Baby Finds Her Feet from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.

The week after Christmas, our family got what felt like the plague.  It started with a common sinus cold with all 3 of us and moved into a fever for Miguel and Linnea.  With all 3 of us sick at the same time, but me the least "sick", I was up all night with Linnea who couldn't breathe through her nose.  It is so sad to have such a little being that only wants to suck on her pacifier to go to sleep - since she hasn't slept all day - and she can't breathe with it in her mouth.  Luckily the sickness didn't hit until we were back from our 3 hour drive to my mom's house.  The next week, however, was painful for all of us.

I thought I had evaded the fever portion of the cold, but alas, come Tuesday evening, I was shiverring with a temperature of 102.  I wanted to be chipper because Miguel's brother Chris was visiting for a week, but I had lost my voice by dinnertime, and I felt like I'd been rolled flat by a steamroller.  I went home and immediately got in a scalding hot bath to get warm.  I tried to sleep, but still woke up to feed Linnea who was a snot bundle herself.  Nursing with a stuffy nose is tricky and generally un-fun for all involved.  A couple days later, Linnea and I both had laryngitis - and if you've ever seen an infant with a silent cry, it is super duper sad.  She was trying so hard to scream and yell and tears were rolling down her cheeks, but nothing was coming out.  It reminded me of those dreams I sometimes get where I'm terrified that the bad guy is going to attack me and when I yell, nothing comes out of my mouth - terrifying.  

It is now the second week of January, and the snot-monster hangs on.  Linnea will be so peacefully falling to sleep when all of a sudden, slurp gurgle grr comes out of her - trying to breathe through her nose.  This startles her awake and often at a crying stage.  It is just like that piece of spinach you see on your friends tooth, and you just wish you could wipe it away as they're in the middle of this wonderful story - but you leave it there as to not interrupt.  We want so badly to stick that little plunger up her nostril and slurp out a big green snot-monster; it should be that easy.  However, EVERY time we broke down and actually tried it, all we got was an empty plunger and a pissed off Linnea.  Even with all the times we've tried and failed, when it happens again, we have to fight the urge to squeegee with the plunger tooth-and-nail, and sometimes the urge wins out.  "If we could just get that one glob of snot out, she'll fall right asleep", we tell ourselves - over and over again.  The last several nights, I've resorted to just laying her on her side - and hoping she'll breathe out of the clear side.  If that doesn't work, she gets to sleep between us in the bed - which miraculously works most of the time.  Hmmm is this legitimate snot or some sort of ploy to get into the big bed?  Regardless, once this snot session is over, I'm looking forward to that gentle breathing sound once more. 

Today marks the last day of my first "Boot Camp".  I really enjoyed the class, and surprisingly the 5:30am start time wasn't much of an issue.  About 90% of the mornings I was already half awake nursing Linnea, so jumping into some workout clothes and heading to a boxing gym wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.  I kind of liked coming home at 6:45, ready to see Linnea and start the day.  Every once in awhile she'd go to sleep for an hour after we ate breakfast, and I'd catch a little cat nap before work. 

I'm finding that the scheduling has become the biggest issue - time management.  I have an overarching feeling that I'm always rushing to do the next thing.  Rushing to work, rushing to get home to feed the kiddo, rushing to eat dinner and get ready for bed before the last feeding of the night.  The only time I'm not rushing is when I'm feeding Linnea.  

Now I'm starting on a night run with Bethany and whomever wants to join us.  This is going to be a trick.  Rush home, change my clothes, feed Linnea, and I'm out the door.  I want to start taking a boxing class or cross fit class, but all too soon I'm realizing that the only hours I'm spending with Linnea are on weekends and briefly in the morning.  Otherwise she's eating, fussing or sleeping.  Argh.  Miguel and I are trying to figure out a sustainabe schedule, but it's a big change not to be able to workout together anymore, and neither of us is getting the same amount of exercise as we used to.  

And to boot, I NEED the workouts.  I could use 2 running nights AND the kickboxing and cross fit.  Not to mention a mountain bike ride again someday.  I gained about 25 pounds during the pregnancy and I lost about 10 right after the birth.  Somehow with 6 weeks of boot camp behind me, a pretty typical "Heather" diet, and even some runs here and there, I'm still hainging onto the 15 lbs I had 3 months ago.  I'm giving myself 3 more months and that weight had better disappear so I can start wearing OTHER pants again.  

Luckily Linnea continues to be cute.  She's worth all this trouble, so I'm not to bothered by it.  She started pulling my hair 3 days ago.  This might sound like a negative, but it really is a sign of progression.  She's actively and regularly grabbing things now.  Toys, rings, papers, and her very cute stuffed and cuddly puppy dog.  She does manage to turn her beaming smile off when the cameras come out, but if you were to see her in person, your heart would melt with her giant grins.

I think I'll sign up for the next boot camp.  I'm up to 5 pullups and I need at least another 5 before I'll consider myself "back in shape" - I despise that phrase.  And frisbee!  Frisbee will once again be in my repoitoire.    We're also redesigning the gym website, so at least this next series of Boot Camp classes will be paid for, and I have no excuses.  Bring it on.

Oh, and I had to include this super cute photo of Mocha.  She keeps an eye out for the times when we forget to pick up Linnea's Boppy (moon-shaped pillow) off the couch - if it is unattended, she moves in.  Look how sweetly she has plugged herself right into the Mocha-sized hole in the center.  14 years old, still lookin' great, and always a little stinker.  Way to go Mocha!

This is going to be our first week without a dinner train.  For two whole months, our network of friends has sustained our dinner needs and many of our lunches.  Today marks the first weekday when we'll have to feed ourselves.

We've gone in with Andy and Katie on a "nanny share".  We interviewed several contestants and have chosen one lucky lady to watch our two little babies for a few hours each day.  It's a bit of a "letting go" feeling to shut the door behind me without a family member watching over Linnea.  It takes a lot of trust and will power, that first time especially.  Lucky for us the sitter we've had so far has been top notch and Linnea has been pretty good during the afternoons.  So far, no complaints on either side.  

Last week, I got my first real smile when I came home from work, like she was actually happy to see me.  It only happened once, but it was pretty special.

She's starting to make little cooing noises now after she finishes eating and she's in a good mood.  Sometimes we're not sure if it is an "on the verge of crying" noise, but if she smiles afterwards, it's really cute.  Sometimes she's not happy with our choice of comforting technique and we know it because she pulls out her Nazgul noises - those servants of Sauron in Lord of the Rings.  Our little Nazgul is the cutest of them all.  Her smiles are humongous, they light up the room and make you feel like you're doing the right thing, but they're also like Doritos - in that the more you get, the more you want.

Last night we had our first concern that she may have an ear infection.  She just didn't want to nurse on the left side and she screamed and screamed.  We tried bouncing and rocking and singing, and just couldn't figure it out, because she seemed hungry.  Then as a last ditch effort, I tried the right side.  She nursed contentedly for 20 minutes.  So then I went from being worried that she had a fever, an uncomfortable diaper, or hated my breastmilk - to worring that she didn't want to lay on her right side because of an ear infection.  It's probably neither, but what a pain in the butt to keep worrying like I'm walking a tightrope.  It feels like there is a thin happy go lucky path we can take, but fall to either side and all hell breaks loose.

I went shopping this weekend with Mom and Linnea.  Linnea probably broke her record for sleeping time - almost 5 hours!  She loves the hustle and bustle in the background.  They've got a ton of brightly colored outfits for sale these days.  I'm trying to stay away from anything pastel for this kid, so we found lots of cute little outfits.  We figured that she'd wake up when we put her back in the car, so we risked getting this photo with Santa.  Mom is a sucker for Santa photos, and obviously this is the real Santa.  Linnea was in true form with the rest of of her photos, as you can see.

I've fallen in love with the little curl of hair on top of her head that stands straight up about an inch.  Someday it will grow out, and it makes me realize how all the little things I notice about her are going to fade away.  I'm afraid that I'm going to forget them.  

She loves the wind.  When we go outside, she quiets down so she can hear the trees and the traffic.  She shuts her eyes.

I call her kiddo, babes, LE and LE-Meister and she laughs when I give her a friendly snarl. 

This weekend I took on the task of going to Costco with Linnea.  I noticed as I was driving along in the heavy traffic on the way there, that my grip on the steering wheel was tightening and my heart was beating a little faster than usual.  In my head I was playing out all the scenarios I could think of involving me and a crying baby in the middle of the store.  People staring and gawking and shaking their heads saying "shut that kid up".  Me frantically trying to shhh and bounce, while spit-up came spewing out of her mouth all over the floor.  I'm stuck in the middle of a long line of people with overflowing baskets....and the person in front of me is trying to use a coupon that doesn't work and she only has a VISA credit card, which Costco doesn't accept....

I pull the car into the parking lot, planning a spot good for a quick get-away.  As I'm carrying Linnea in her carseat and feeling my shaking legs, I see a woman coming out of the store.  She's totally cool headed, like she's practically by herself, BUT she's got a baske full of stuff, two boys that look 3 and 4 years old tugging on the cart, and a baby in a baby sling.  What?  People do this with more than one?  Inconceivable.  I head to the desk to make a return of a shirt that was too small, and luckily there are only 3 people ahead of me.  Linnea is quiet "for now" I think, and I slowly put her into a gentle rocking motion.  She's totally silent.  She sucks on her pacifier like a good little girl.  Still, I play out the worst scenarios I can think of - just in case.

This is obvoiusly something I'm going to have to get over.  I can't go around for the rest of Linnea's childhood a nervous wreck - especially if she's going to continue being so good.  Yes, GOOD.  That's what I said.  For the entire trip to Costco, she slept in her carseat as I pushed her around in the cart.  We even stopped by Fred Meyer on the way home and loaded a full cart with groceries, and she slept.  Quiet as a mouse.  Then, we went to a small party with 7 other couples and their babies (a reunion with our Bradley Method class), and aside from a brief period of crying, she was a little princess.  She laid on her back in a little play mat with dangling toys for almost 30 minutes!  Fully awake and just looking at people's knees, the furniture, and the other babies.  You can even see in the video below that she's got total self-composure until she realizes shes being squished from both sides.  As an aside, I had no idea that 6 babies on a couch would be so adorable.

So far, she obvoiusly doesn't warrant the clammy hands and racing heartbeat I get before embarking into a public place indoors.  It will happen, however, I know it will.  One day I'll be in an enclosed area with no quick getaway and I'll have a crying baby on my hands.  Everyone will be staring.  It is going to happen and I'm going to have to deal.  I bet I'll even live to tell about it.    

Reunion for Bradley Method Class from Heather Alvis on Vimeo.